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How are you?  -fine, thanks.

What is Escape To Hazzard County?  -the world's greatest hillbilly campout event.  duh.  didn't you read that on the flyer?

What is included?  -beer, booze, BBQ, camp spot, event shirt, event patch, event tattoos, bag o' free shit, bands, hillbilly games, the cockfight, hillbilly sumo wrestling, daisy duke contest, breakfast sunday morning, and the best blurry memories you'll ever have.

Where is it?  -Santa Barbara, CA.  we'll email you an exact address prior to the event.

Is Escape to Hazzard County sanctioned by the self-appointed "scene" authorities?  -probably not.  we don't care.  we just want to party.

Is HC5 all ages?  -no.  you must be 21 to enter. you will be ID'd at entry so don't show up thinking your puppy dog eyes will get you in.  your underage ass just wasted $85.

Does my passenger need a wristband?  -yes.  unless you are leaving them at the front gate for the event, everyone must have THEIR OWN WRISTBAND to get in.

Do I need to ride a motorcycle to come?  -no.  bikes, vans, and customs get preferred (upper camp) parking/camping, but you are welcome to drive or ride whatever you want.

How come my shirt didn't come in the mail?  -the only thing that will come in the mail is your wristband.  all of your other free shit will be waiting on you at HC5.

If I don't attend the event will you mail my free shit? -no.  the post office sucks and we hate going there.

Can I get a refund?  I bought my ticket and now my dog is sick and my niece has some dumb fucking thing I have to go to or whatever the fuck else follow up explanation...  -no.  sorry, but there are no refunds for any reason.  just replace "Escape to Hazzard County" with "Rod Stewart Concert" when you're drafting your email to ask for a refund.  Sounds ridiculous now, doesn't it.  

What else do the Superfriends do besides Escape To Hazzard County?  -well, we enjoy riding our motorcycles, working on our vans and hot rods, drinking at Gasser Lounge, partying like idiots, and many other dumb/awesome activities.  Escape to Hazzard County is our big annual blowout, and in order to make it happen all nice and legal-like, we had to organize as the "Superfriends."  follow @gasserlounge or @escapetohazzardcounty on Instagram to join us on our next adventure.

I don't like beer.  Will there be anything else to drink?  -yes.  there are non-alcoholic beverages available where you get your food.  aside from that, there will be bottles of moonshine hidden around camp like Easter eggs as well as a pop up margarita stand that will be open for a few hours.  it's up to you to find it.  part of the fun, brah.

Will there be vegetarian food options?-yes.  just ask the folks working the food service line.

Will there be vegan options?  -no.  well, maybe.  we don't fucking know what vegans can or can't eat.  there will be grass and trees and hay all over the place so if that's vegan then yes. 

Can I bring fireworks?  -no.  we're in the middle of a record drought and we don't need your sparklers burning down the camp.

Can I bring weapons?  -no.  Hazzard County is a tough guy free zone.  take your Sons of Anarchy role-playing shit somewhere else.

What do I need to bring?  -whatever you need to camp.  we are providing all of your food, booze, and entertainment.  there are showers on site. it may get cold and it may get wet so pack prepare accordingly.

Who is performing at HC5?  -Royal Rats, Kira Lingman, Banquet, Lost Beach, Rhyolite Sound, The Curly Wolf, BOB WAYNE. 

Should I wear my floppy hat and high-waisted jeans?  -oh, totally.  you look so cute in those.